Thursday Feb 22, 2001 - We had some people come by today who fell in love with the house. I am sure they are going to make an offer or just buy it. I got summons for Jury duty for the 2 time in the past few years. I am moving so I won't have to go. I don't want to have to do jury duty. 

Wednesday Feb 21, 2001 - The count down is on. The Day after tomorrow they will be moving all our stuff then on the 1st we fly down to our new home. It's getting close! I won't be back on camera from Feb 23 - March 2 or 3rd.. But the site will still be here and so will all the other girls so don't worry.;) There are all these little things to pack all over the house now.. Most of it is done though. I have to take Bookie and Nemo down to the Vet's office today and get a Health Clearance for the Airline. For those of you who are new and aren't familiar with the members area yet there is a Live Video Schedule at the top Left hand side of the Screen when you first enter the members area right under where it says "Live Video Feeds" click on the "Live Video Schedule" and see when the girls will be on then exit out that window when you are done looking at the schedule, then just click on the Name of the Girl you want to see on the Left hand side Members page below the Live Video Schedule Link.. They will be on as the Schedule states. Then there are all the other feeds you can choose from also, they are 24 hour feeds they will be in the Middle and Right hand Section of the Screen saying "Video Feeds" with their name of what they are. Just so you get the idea of how it works. Anyone who wants a Free Homepage can now sign up for it on my new Internet Community. You can make your own homepage at Land of Venus Internet Community, let me know if something is wrong or you have any questions. It's free like other Free home page communities, we don't give away any personal info what so ever when you sign up.. I allow adult material as long as it's not illegal!

Tuesday Feb 20, 2001 - All I get emailed any more is why I don't talk about Fitness and working out in here. Sorry but anyone who talks about it and thinks about it every moment of their day has a bad Self Image Issue. It's ok to get into and talk about when you first start comps and stuff but I have other interests and working out is only a small part of my life. I love working out and can't wait to get back into my routine but I don't obsess on it. I'm starting my regular routine when I get moved but till then life goes on. I've always worked out and been in some kind of Activity so it's not new to me. Some of you ask why don't I Bodybuild and why am I wanting to do Fitness. Well, Bodybuilding is more of a beauty Competition with muscles and I would rather do a sport then a Beauty type competition. Sports are a lot more fun. If any of you have ever tried to do a bodybuilding diet then you would know why I'm not going to do every comp that comes my way! I want to look more like a fitness model. I didn't look healthy when I was 8% body fat, at least I didn't feel healthy. Bodybuilding leads you no where in life. It's the most unhealthy thing I've ever done in my life! If a women wants to get to pro level she will eventually end up looking like a drag queen! That is not where I want to be in life. I will do Natural Bodybuilding Comps again but on my own time. When I feel ready. I refuse to ruin my life over a Comp that I have to spend my own time and money on (which gets VERY expensive) and all you get is a trophy. If I do it for myself it's great, but I can't do a comp for any other reason then that. I think the Natural Bodybuilding comps are great but I'll do them when I'm ready. I am not making a career out of it and the people that want to go pro has a very distorted View of that kind of life. It's all drugs people! Wake up! If you want to die at a young old age go ahead and go for it. I want to live happily with my dogs and husband.:) A lot of people get mad because I'm telling it how it is. Don't get mad. I don't look down on people who want to do that lifestyle. It's just not what I want to be in life. I like my looks to much to ruin them.

Monday Feb 19, 2001 - The trucking company that is moving our Vehicles took our car today. It's on it's way to the East Coast soon. There is a Cat Show after we get there so I can't wait. A realtor showed our home today but we haven't had anyone jump on it yet. The end of this week the movers will be here to load all our stuff and move it. I can't wait to leave.. I need Moisture!! I hate the dryness here. My darn lips are cracking every other week.. I'll take humid any day.. I want to thank you Angie & Dan for sending my Mom that Intella Mouse.. She loves it! I got this from a E-Mail Group I'm in and had to post it..

A STRONG WOMAN vs WOMAN OF STRENGTH  

 A strong woman works out every day to keep her body in shape - but a woman of strength kneels in prayer  to keep her soul in shape. A strong woman isn't afraid of anything - but a woman of strength shows courage in the midst of her fear. A strong woman won't let anyone get the best of her - but a woman of strength gives the best of her to everyone. A strong woman makes mistakes and avoids the same in the future - but a woman of strength realizes life's mistakes can also be God's blessings and capitalizes on them. A strong woman walks sure footedly - but a woman of strength knows God will catch her when she falls. A strong woman wears the look of confidence on her face - but a woman of strength wears grace. A strong woman has faith that she is strong enough for the journey -  but a woman of strength has faith that it is in the journey that she will become strong. Pass this on to every woman of strength you know - I just did! 

Sunday Feb 18, 2001 - I have been hanging here at home waiting to move! Sometimes I don't think I should put anything in here then again I don't really mind people knowing how I'm feeling at that time. The word for the Century is  trichotillomania.. That is a new word I learned. I didn't know what that was until I searched for hair pulling in Adults. I've also been looking for Obedience training for when we move and I found a great Training place that is Registered with the AKC I can train with Nemo at. I'm going to Start Obedience Trials with him at the end of this summer. I was talking to Someone else who has a Frenchie and he does that also, it's better and more fun then Confirmination to! I will try to teach Bookie to but he don't listen to me worth a darn. If I can teach Bookie I can teach any dog.. I think that will be a great thing to do with my dogs. I also want to get their Therapy Dog Certification so I can take them around as therapy dogs to see patients. 

Friday Feb 16, 2001 - I know I haven't been writing in here a whole lot. But I've just been getting things done at a nice pace and don' t have anything new going on. I called my Brother tonight, I figured I better drop any hard feelings I have since life is to short to hold them for too long. Many people in this world don't figure that out and end up dyeing with all kind of sorrows. I've known quit a few who just don't let go of the past. We should all learn to do that. Unless you know the person is a real money hungry free loafer and won't ever be nice! Most family have good intentions and sometimes just don't think or know how much they hurt your feelings or whatever.. So why hold on to frivolous petty things.  I got this in a E-mail Group that I'm in and had to post this for us Future Parents to be and those that all ready have children..

I LOVED YOU ENOUGH...

Someday when my children are old enough to
understand the logic that motivates a parent,
I will tell them: I loved you enough...
to ask where you were going,
with whom, and what time you would be home.

I loved you enough... to insist that you save
your money and buy a bike for yourself even
though we could afford to buy one for you.

I loved you enough... to be silent and let
you discover that your new best friend was a creep.

I loved you enough... to make you go back and
pay for the bubblegum you had taken and tell
the clerk, "I stole this yesterday and want
to pay for it."

I loved you enough... to stand over you for two
hours while you cleaned your room, a job that
should have taken 15 minutes.

I loved you enough ... to let you see anger,
disappointment and tears in my eyes. Children
must learn that their parents aren't perfect.

I loved you enough... to let you assume
responsibility for your actions, even when the
penalties were so harsh they almost broke
my heart.

But most of all, I loved you enough.... to say
NO when I knew you would hate me for it.
Those were the most difficult battles of all.
I'm glad I won them, because in the end you
won, too. And someday when your children
are old enough to understand the logic that
motivates parents, you will tell them...

Was your mom mean??? I know mine was.
We had the meanest mother in the whole world!
While other kids ate candy for breakfast, we
had to have cereal, eggs, and toast. When others
had a Pepsi and a Twinkie for lunch, we had to
eat sandwiches. And you can guess our mother
fixed us a dinner that was different from what
other kids had, too.

Mother insisted on knowing where we were at
all times. You'd think we were convicts in a prison.
She had to know who our friends were, and
what we were doing with them. She insisted
that if we would be gone for an hour, we would
be gone for an hour or less. We were ashamed
to admit it, but she had the nerve to break the
Child Labor Laws by making us work. We had
to wash dishes, make the beds, and learn to
cook, vacuum the floor, do laundry, and empty
the trash and all sorts of cruel jobs. I think she
would lie awake at night thinking of more things
for us to do.

She always insisted on us telling the truth, the
whole truth, and nothing but the truth. By the
time we were teenagers she could read our
minds.

Then, life was really tough! Mother wouldn't
let our friends' just honk the horn when they
drove up. They had to come up to the door
so she could meet them. While everyone else
could date when they were 12 or 13, we had
to wait until we were 16. Because of our
mother we missed out on lots of things other
kids experienced. None of us have ever been
caught shoplifting, vandalizing other's property
or ever arrested for any crime. It was all her
fault.

Now that we have left home we are all
educated, honest adults.

We are doing our best to be mean parents just
like mom was.

I think that is what's wrong with the world
today. It just doesn't have enough mean moms.

PASS THIS ON TO ALL THE MEAN MOTHERS YOU
KNOW.

Wednesday Feb 14, 2001 - Happy Valentines Day everyone... I packed 3 more boxes today.. I'm getting closer but man we got a lot of stuff. We stayed home and didn't go anywhere because we are expecting some phone calls about the trucking company picking up the cars to be shipped out in the next couple days. 

Tuesday Feb 13, 2001 - Frech bulldog!!!!!! Darn Judges didn't pick the French Bulldog in the Wesminster Kennel Club dog show.  Fuckem! I received this joke in email and had to post it..

This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for 40yrs. The

only friction in their marriage was the husband's  habit of farting loudly

every morning when he woke. The noise would wake his wife and the smell

would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.  Every morning she

would plead  with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her

sick.  He told  her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural.

She told him to  see a Doctor; she was concerned that one day he would blow

his guts out.

The years went by and he continued to rip them out!  Then, one Thanksgiving

morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs

sound asleep, she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey innards

and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts and a malicious thought

came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was

sound asleep and gently pulling back the bed covers she pulled back the

elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts

into his shorts.

Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which

was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps

as he ran into the bathroom.  The wife could hardly control herself as she

rolled on the floor laughing; tears in her  eyes.  After years of torture

she reckoned she had got her own back.

About twenty minutes later, her husband  came downstairs in his

bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his  face.  She bit her

lip as she asked him what was the matter. He said, "Honey,  you were right.

All those years you warned me and I didn't listen to  you."  "What do you

mean," asked his wife.

"Well, you always told me that  on day I would end up farting my guts out

and today it finally happened.  But.....by the grace of God, some Vaseline

and these two fingers, I think I  got most of them back in."

  Smile and have a good one!  ;-)

Monday Feb 12, 2001 - I haven't been out of the house really at all. We are trying to save money and we keep on having to change reservations and getting charged then refunded a couple times now. The refunds won't show up till next month probably so it's like we spent the money and I'm probably stressed out more then I really should be. Ahh! Moving is a big pain and I hate it. All in all things have been going pretty good. I just hope the people that transport our Vehicles are good and we don't end up in a rut. The Westminster Kennel Club Dog show comes on tonight. My brother called me a week or so ago and borrowed some money and I haven't heard back from him since. I just feel great that that is the only time he likes to call me. Now I am beginning to understand why my family (not immediate) have fought in the past. Maybe not fight but stopped talking to each other. He didn't call me back after he received the money to even thank me and that just makes me feel........................  I don't know, I would thank people who have helped me out because it's a  nice thing to do. I don't or wouldn't take advantage of the fact that they are nice and help out either. I'll probably kick myself for writing to much but life isn't about someone's business, it's about living and learning. Some people just aren't smart enough to learn. Some of us are. I started hunting for a couple of my Old friends from High School and I can't find them. I have been searching on the Net.. I can't find them on ClassMates dot Com because we were all military kids and didn't graduate in the same school or State. Some of us didn't even Graduate. I only know General Directions they went when they moved.  So I'm having a problem finding anyone. I don't want to pay a company to find them because I don't know how much I'll have to end up paying to find them.. I've moved so many times since high school no one would ever be able to locate me.

Saturday Fed 10, 2001 - I have been slowly packing all week. The company won't be here to get our stuff till the 23rd so we still have time. I'll be done by next week anyway. Time can't go quick enough for me because I'm so looking forward to the move. There are nights I get stressed out and shouldn't. Work myself up over nothing. The surpa bags are a little small for my dogs but I refuse to put them under the plane with cargo when we go. So I will put them in the surpa bags and after we get seated I'll put them under my blanket that I'll have over my lap and let bookie sleep on my lap for the whole trip. I am still stressing about my boys being uncomfy.

Wednesday Feb 7, 2001- I am so stressed out tonight. I bought two Serpa bags to carry my dogs Bookie and Nemo onto the Airplane but Bookie is a little to big and isn't going to fit in their comfortably. I have to find a different bigger bag but there isn't any! Not for carry on! It's not like he's a huge dog it's just Frenchies are fatter then the average small dog. I am so worried that they are going to stop me from bringing him on the plane and I just want to cry. Jeff is really making it feel hard (he does have a head-ach tonight so maybe I should settle down) by getting mad because I changed my mind and need to find a way to get a bigger bag for a 28 pound dog, I'll drive by myself if I have to! I'm stressing.

Tuesday Fed! 6, 2001 - The moving company will be here today to give us an estimate on how much it will cost to move all our things. Hopefully it isn't going to cost an arm and a leg. I am guessing it will since we are having them move our Vehicles to. I packed up most of the Pictures off the walls yesterday. We went and rented a couple movies from Hollywood Video yesterday also. We have so much to do before we go. I don't want to sell Tiggy. I've had her for 7 years! Things sure have changed. We came her with 5 cats and I'm leaving with two Dogs. I don't ever want to move after this again. I really want this next place to be a home. I told Jeff that if we like the house we are Renting we could buy it. It's not New, it's not luxurious but it's homey. I don't want to live in the Ritz or lavish. I want a place that feels like home and we would have enough money left over to upgrade everything if we wanted. We could save a tone of money with a lower payment to! Some people want lavish, expensive, flattering. I want home. We could retire early and live a great life if we do that anyway. I've been reading about what other Amateur sites are doing to get members etc... My god are these people stupid or what!? They are having parties and meeting members at bars then doing sex acts. They are starting to get arrested and are complaining about it. duh! They are doing it to get photo's or whatever they think would be a profitable opportunity. I guess they weren't aware that there are certain things you can't do in public. But who said you had to be bright to have a website? To have a Semi-good website you need to have some common sense at least.  

Sunday Fed 4, 2001 - We just got home late last night. We got a Rental home in a state far away from here.;) The pet Sitters feed the dogs while we were gone but I don't think anyone takes care of them like we do. I felt so bad leaving them at home for the last 3 days. I feel like I neglected them by leaving them behind. We did find a nice Rental that we are going to enjoy living in. The first day of looking was terrible and I thought we'd never find a home to rent with a back yard for Bookie and Nemo. The houses were all dumps! The second day we found one that the owners were moving out of and renting it till they figure out if they are going to sell it or not. It's nice and was keep very clean and I am so happy! It has an in-ground pool and you can watch me swim in it this summer. I am glad to be home right now. What a long flight. We are carrying on Bookie and Nemo when we fly back for good so I made sure we fly First Class so we will have enough room for all of us. I thought my legs were going to decay and fall off on the flight back. How very uncomfortable! I hate flying coach. I am going to go get a bunch of boxes tomorrow so I can take down the pictures on the walls and pack them up. We are having all the Walls Re-painted so it will be nice for the next people that move in. I hope to make this next place we move to, the best and more Homey for us and Never to move again! It helps that we love the area we are moving to.  There are a lot more things to do without spending a tone of money to do it there. You will have a lot of New Pictures to look at as soon as we settle in and find some good Picture taking places.

Wednesday Jan 31, 2001 - For the rest of this week I need to pack. Next week we'll be running around to much so I think I should do a lot of it now.

Tuesday Jan 30, 2001 - We got our new Kennel in yesterday and Jeff and I set it up last night. The Net is so quiet today. I feel so alone sitting here surfing the web. No one is in the Chat rooms either. I feel as though if Cyberspace was real, I could yell down the halls of cyber world and hear my echo. To Weird.... AM I THE ONLY ONE LEFT OUT HERE............ECHO, ECHO, ECHO, ECHO. You know what I did tonight? I was shredding cheese then slipped and shredded my knuckle on my finger, owee. Now I have a big hunk of skin missing. An old friend called me tonight! Iseees called me and she is still living here. I haven't heard from her in so long and I lost her number anyway. I need to get my shit straight. I danced with her for a couple years at Jezebels in Wichita Ks and we were pretty good friends. We liked to workout together.

Monday Jan 29, 2001 - I went down to Lowes today and got a bolt cutter, a gallon of paint for the walls, some air filters and trash bags. The handy man will be here in the morning to paint all the walls where there are marks. We can't paint worth crap, we leave brush stroke marks. I am addicted to damn pep pill! I can't stand it. I get off them for a few weeks and I felt like shit. I drag and am plain lazy, if I don't have one or two or three. I wish I would have never found them. I've always been a BIG sleeper. I could win a sleep-a-thon if there was one. If I don't take something to wake me up I'll sleep my life away (very serious). It's not depression either! So don't tell me that. I could sleep till I was old and decayed. My brain feels like it's decaying from to much sleep sometimes. I can feel it hurt, sometimes I wonder if it's starting to decay on me.. Maybe my hyper childhood finally caught up with me when I hit 15. That is why I always did bad in school to, I was to tired to listen. That is awful! Sometimes I wonder if not wanting to be tired makes you want to sleep more. That really sounds confusing. People always ask me more lately if I'm tired to! Sometimes I'm not but I guess most of the time I always look tired (and am). What in the hell is going to make me look and feel alive?! Vitamins don't even help. I feel as though I'm wasting my life with sleep and in lala land (dreams). I want to have more energy for my dogs and my man. Sometimes I wonder is it me that is the problem, is it all in my head? I search but it's not me. I don't intentionally make myself feel tired. I want to feel awake! I felt this way since I was around 15 or so.. I was hoping I'd outgrow it. I am grateful of the husband I have. He just tells me he thinks a lot of Women are like that and I shouldn't worry to much. Most men would verbally abuse a women and tell her to get up bla, bla, bla. I do keep my home clean and make sure it's not a total disaster but I think I sleep to much so I know I do. I have my good months where I do a lot and am not tired all that much (that is the period I learned web design and all). Then there are these months where my body goes into hibernation mode. I don't like it at all. 

Saturday Jan 27, 2001 - I know a lot of people are wondering where I'm moving to, and all I am going to say right now is it's EAST.;) I love my bookie and nemo and wouldn't get another dog, two is enough. I feel like I give them enough attention and if I had three I wouldn't be able to like they need. It is nice to look around at them, I am a fanatic. When we move at the end of Feb you won't have to worry about the site being down. We have all our Servers Co-Located now so we won't have to shut anything down any more. It's better for Cost also since it is a lot cheaper then it use to be to Co-locate. I've been asked why we are moving. This is our Dream home and we love this house very much (I feel like it's a part of me), but it is located inside an association and we hate the standards of the Association. If I want to plant or change something I don't want someone telling me I can't do it. If we don't have rocks around a tree they send us a notice and that is a little extreme for me. Jeff and I love to Scuba Dive and do outside things and there isn't much you can do here in Vegas beside go to Casino's. That is real boring after awhile. This past summer it stayed around 115 degrees for a couple months and that just did it for me. I'd rather have it 80 degrees and Humid then a dry 115 for two months straight. We don't know anyone in Vegas and the people we have meet are Flaky as hell. I really don't want anything to do with this place and most of the people here. We know people where we are moving and that will be better for us since we can get out once in awhile with decent people. There is a better Job Market where we are moving also (if the need ever arises). Las Vegas really only has Casino's and I don't want to work at those and the strip clubs here are something to be desired from my end. Lets hope we keep up the great reputation and our site keeps thriving. To be on the safe side we want to move to a place we don't mind being stuck in if the time ever comes. The way everything looks with Bush in office is not promising. I have gotten quit a few e-mails about people worrying about their money situation just because of all that. I just like to keep it real and safe so we have made this decision. It's something how a presidency can bring down or up a whole nation. We want to Save money for our Future and think that making smart decisions like this will help us accomplish all that. 

Friday Jan 26, 2001 - Why! Why! Why! I do these things to myself. There is a Black masked fawn French bulldog for sale on excite and he looks real healthy and I want him now. Don't worry I learned my lesson with getting pixie, not to get a doggie over the net! But man I have Frenchie Fever! I've been packing and getting my house cleaned. It's clean now! The other Real Estate lady was here today and went over the house. I can't wait to go to ..... opps I almost spilled the beans!

Thursday Jan 25, 2001 - I am thinking of doing a surprise unscheduled show tonight but I am not sure what time yet. I have to clean my floors today so I'll be down on my knees getting them spotless. 

Wednesday Jan 24, 2001 - The people from the Jenny Jones Show keep contacting me to be on that show. I think those show's are the most embarrassing and I would never be on one. If your a Female Bodybuilder and don't mind to be on a show like that just email me and I'll put you in contact with them. I personally think they are a joke.

Tuesday Jan 23, 2001 - Yesterday I got my Eye Brows Waxed, Nails done and my Legs Waxed. The Real Estate Lady was here last night and looked over the house. The Pet Sitter was also here to talk about how we feed the dogs and so forth, for when they Baby sit while we are gone for a few days, to get our Rental home. We got up a little early this morning and loaded up the dogs and went to California to Drop off two more of our servers to co-locate. Now we don't have to get any more T-1's installed in our new home, they will all be co-located some where so that if we need more bandwidth or whatever it will be a lot easier to do. I stayed outside with Bookie & Nemo while Jeff went in and set the servers up. On the way back Jeff was speeding, we got pulled over and got a ticket in Baker California. This side of the United States is so shitty. They have rolling blackouts in California, so that is shutting down the major Gas Pipeline (CALNEV) and almost all the gas stations are out of all gas except for Regular. One of them we stopped at today didn't have any gas. So Las Vegas is having a major Gas problem because of California. Thank goodness we are moving next month! I was pissed after we first left this morning because Jeff was cussing out a lady and getting the "Road Rage" syndrome this morning, then I spilled syrup all over me and just about wanted to smash those McDonalds Hot cakes in his face for stopping so fast (I love the man to much to do something like that though). So my pants were sticky for the rest of the day and I got paper stuck to them because of all that syrup, I didn't eat those Hot cakes (not like I need to!) because I had the ass. I got over that though. Tonight we did the wild thing and oh my, that man is more man then anyone I will or have ever meet (not like I am going to meet anyone else or want to!)..

Sunday Jan 21, 2001 - I talked in the chat room for a while last night. We ended up going to the Mirage because I'm collecting a glass from every Casino before we move. We ate at the Carib Cafe in the Mirage and it was one of the worst places to eat since I've been here. I still like the Venetian Hotel Restaurants better then most of the other Casino's. I have a Rio glass and two mirage glasses now. I use to have a Ceasers Palace glass but I put it in the dishwasher and ruined it. We are going out to the strip a few times a week till we move so I can get one or two glasses from every major Casino in town. I want to get a glass case to put them in with other decorative items. We picked up some U-Haul Boxes and boxing stuff so I can start slowly packing stuff we are not going to use. I got Bookie some Hill Science Prescription diet Z/D because I read an article about Regurgitation/Vomiting and the article said, that kind of food could possibly help. We went down to the Venetian today and I got two glasses from there also. I had a show at 7pm and ended up doing a liquid latex show. I am never doing that again! Owwweeeee! Hurt my damn legs.:) I didn't think I'd ever get it all off. Here is a picture of me with the latex Jeff took of me. Can't wait to move! I've been a military brat too long. I feel secure about where we are moving, I feel if I had a baby I would feel safe raising him/her there. I don't think Las Vegas is a good place to raise a child at all. I'm not planning on having a baby right away but when I do I'll feel secure about having it where we will be. 

Friday Jan 19, 2001 - We have been busy! I think we found a place to rent now. How wonderful. It's not far from water either. yahooo! We aren't buying a house till we get to know the place we are moving a little better and sell this house we have here in Vegas. That is all I've been doing for the past two days is calling around and checking on places for rent. We finally found a nice place that will let us have Bookie and Nemo, I refuse to live anywhere that won't let me. I'd live out on the street with my dogs if someone told me I couldn't have them. The Handy Man was here this morning looking at all the things we want him to fix. He will be back tomorrow to work on some of them. He's going to paint the places that need touched up to. The New Landscapers are here today fixing the yard and laying decorative rock. The Real Estate Lady will be here on Monday. We want this place to sell fast so we are making sure everything is nice and perfect. Our expected move out date is the end of February now.. Wow.. I didn't think we would end up getting out of here that fast. We will never live in an Association again. I think we learned a lot of what we want and don't want with a home from this home we bought. It's a learning experience and we don't want to make the same mistakes again when we purchase our next one. Bookie and Nemo finally won a contest! One that no one voted on either, to many people that cheat out there! Fablestone Bulldogs by Mark Wallace has a Photo contest and they won last month. I love my dogs, I am so proud.:) They don't know about my website they just know about my dogs. My website is on a Need to know basis and they don't need to know if it's my dogs who are the one's in the contest. I was talking to Indyrod in the Chat room tonight and we always like to pick on each other if you know what I mean. All I have to say is, "Indyrod has a small Dysfunctional Dick"..:) I talked to my brother last night and told him we were moving but I woke him up because it was around midnight their time. He told me he'd call back today but I didn't hear from him. I am not sure if he remembered.

Wednesday Jan 17, 2001 - We have discussed living here and have been through the pro's and Con's. So we are moving. Selling this house, it's not made as good as we once thought also. I am keeping where we are moving to myself since I don't want the whole world knowing where I am living. It's as much a business decision as is a personal one since the cost of living and other things are higher here then they are where we are moving to. We are expected to move in April or May, depending on how fast things go or don't go. We've done a lot of researching and found the place we are going to be a wise choice. We will be looking at houses with a real estate agent at the beginning of next month. Hopefully we will have ours up for sale in the next few weeks. It will sell fast, I give it a couple weeks. I went to the gym and did the stepper for 20 minutes today and then worked my abs. I cleaned yesterday and also made dog food. I am in the process of getting this house spotless for Viewing! I guess I better let Joeam out of the closet before the people coming to see my house freek out (inside joke).. Oh god, I was talking with ToddJ and he had me go to KillFrog.com and boy I got a hell of a laugh! Go to new stuff then Dumbass Bass, roflmao.....

Sunday Jan 14, 2001 - We got up and went to the gym today. I did 20 Minutes on the stepper then some abs work. I need to get my Kitchen floor cleaned sometime today or maybe after my show. I also need to clean my bathroom. Lets see how much I can get done. My show is at 7pm and I've been staying up half the night anyway so I'll probably be up all night cleaning.  I'm starting to get into the routine where I sleep until noon and don't get to bed until 2am or 3am. I hired a landscaper to do our back yard in the spring and now the association writes us a letter saying we needed to notify them to accept the layout and that there is a problem with the exterior wall. Oh Boy! It seems as though nothing has really worked out since we moved here, my fault to. I am just about to tell Jeff to lets sell the house and move away from this city that has too many fakes and you can't hire someone to do a very good job no matter what  you do. The landscaper I hired even did a half ass job and now is causing us problems in our back yard because of drainage problems etc! 

Saturday Jan 13, 2001 - It's Nemo's 1st Birthday today!! Yipeeeeee! Happy Birthday to my Nemie. We went and saw the moving, "Finding Forester" last night. What a wonderful movie. Never have thought they could make a good movie about writing. Makes me want to go out and buy Edgar Allan Poe or something. I had my show at 7pm last night, I had to push it back an hour because I was in the middle of making my dog food and was running late all day. Not because lack of sleep to say the least!! 

Thursday Jan 11, 2001 - I got up fairly late today. All I seem to be doing lately is working on my site or surfing the net and looking at French Bulldog websites. I feel like my whole body is starting to decay from sitting to long! I get up and I can just about feel my bones creak. I need to do something besides computer and I am not motivated to clean all day either. My house stays fairly clean anyway. I am thinking about getting a membership to an all Female gym, I hate going to the coed one's. It seems like most of the people at the coed one's go there to flirt or something, like it's social hour! Not my type of workout. I hate being stared at to. I got a subscription to the French Bulletin Magazine and also got a book called "Healthy Frenchies- an owners Manual". Give me something to read when I'm tired of staring at a computer screen. I was talking to a guy named Dan in my chat room and he has a Frenchie named Mr. Magoo (Brindle)! He told me about a book he's got and that is how I ended up ordering my book and the Magazine. When I get an opportunity to talk Frenchie, I take advantage of it..:) Unlike country folk, my dogs are my Baby's (for real). I ate like my stomach was a never ending pit today. errrr! I talked to my Mom on Yahoo Messenger. She was off the past couple days, thank goodness. She don't need to be working but she has to. I wish I could help her out more but I need to save a lot of money myself. You don't realize how much you spend etc, until you add up your bills and all the here and there things you get.

Wednesday Jan 10, 2001 -  I mopped my downstairs marble floor today. I made some pasta for myself tonight, It was real good to. At 7pm I did a workout here at home (My Cory Everson workout Video). I watched that show "Temptation Island" tonight, those people have to be actors or at least some of it is a role play. I am not going to have a baby for a couple more years but I am wanting to decorate my downstairs bedroom. Then I might change my mind about having a baby because it never seems to be a good time to have one. So I guess I'll wait and see what happens. This weekend I have a class so I won't get home till in the afternoon. Someone name William sent me this touching Testament of a Dog Poem and I have to post it for you all.. 

THE LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT OF AN EXTREMELY DISTINGUISHED DOG by Eugene O'Neill Tao House, December 17, 1940

I, SILVERDENE EMBLEM O'NEILL (familiarly known to my family, friends, and acquaintances as Blemie), because the burden of my years and infirmities is heavy upon me, and I realize the end of my life is near, do hereby bury my last will and testament in the mind of my Master. He will not know it is there until after I am dead. Then, remembering me in his loneliness, he will suddenly know of this testament, and I ask him then to inscribe it as a memorial to me.

I have little in the way of material things to leave. Dogs are wiser than men. They do not set great store upon things. They do not waste their days hoarding property. They do not ruin their sleep worrying about how to keep the objects they have, and to obtain the objects they have not. There is nothing of value I have to bequeath except my love and my faith. These I leave to all those who have loved me, to my Master and Mistress, who I know will mourn me most, to Freeman who has been so good to me, to Cyn and Roy and Willie and Naomi and -- But if I should list all those who have loved me, it would force my Master to write a book. Perhaps it is vain of me to boast when I am so near death, which returns all beasts and vanities to dust, but I have always been an extremely lovable dog.

I ask my Master and Mistress to remember me always, but not to grieve for me too long. In my life I have tried to be a comfort to them in time of sorrow, and a reason for added joy in their happiness. It is painful for me to think that even in death I should cause them pain. Let them remember that while no dog has ever had a happier life (and this I owe to their love and care for me), now that I have grown blind and deaf and lame, and even my sense of smell fails me so that a rabbit could be right under my nose and I might not know, my pride has sunk to a sick, bewildered humiliation. I feel life is taunting me with having over-lingered my welcome. It is time I said good-bye, before I become too sick a burden on myself and on those who love me. It will be sorrow to leave them, but not a sorrow to die. Dogs do not fear death as men do. We accept it as part of life, not as something alien and terrible which destroys life. What may come after death, who knows? I would like to believe with those my fellow Dalmatians who are devote Mohammedans, that there is a Paradise where one is always young and full-bladdered; where all the day one dillies and dallies with an amorous multitude of houris [lovely nymphs], beautifully spotted; where jack rabbits that run fast but not too fast (like the houris) are as the sands of the desert; where each blissful hour is mealtime; where in long evenings there are a million fireplaces with logs forever burning, and one curls oneself up and blinks into the flames and nods and dreams, remembering the old brave days on earth,and the love of one's Master and Mistress.

I am afraid this is too much for even such a dog as I am to expect. But peace, at least, is certain. Peace and long rest for weary old heart and head and limbs, and eternal sleep in the earth I have loved so well. Perhaps, after all, this is best.

One last request I earnestly make. I have heard my Mistress say, "When Blemie dies we must never have another dog. I love him so much I could never love another one." Now I would ask her, for love of me, to have another. It would be a poor tribute to my memory never to have a dog again. What I would like to feel is that, having once had me in the family, now she cannot live without a dog! I have never had a narrow jealous spirit. I have always held that most dogs are good (and one cat, the black one I have permitted to share the living room rug during the evenings, whose affection I have tolerated in a kindly spirit, and in rare sentimental moods, even reciprocated a trifle). Some dogs, of course, are better than others. Dalmatians, naturally, as everyone knows, are best. So I suggest a Dalmatian as my successor. He can hardly be as well bred or as well mannered or as distinguished and handsome as I was in my prime. My Master and Mistress must not ask the impossible. But he will do his best, I am sure, and even his inevitable defects will help by comparison to keep my memory green. To him I bequeath my collar and leash and my overcoat and raincoat, made to order in 1929 at Hermes in Paris. He can never wear them with the distinction I did, walking around the Place Vendome, or later along Park Avenue, all eyes fixed on me in admiration; but again I am sure he will do his utmost not to appear a mere gauche provincial dog. Here on the ranch, he may prove himself quite worthy of comparison, in some respects. He will, I presume, come closer to jack rabbits than I have been able to in recent years.

And for all his faults, I hereby wish him the happiness I know will be his in my old home.

One last word of farewell, Dear Master and Mistress. Whenever you visit my grave, say to yourselves with regret but also with happiness in your hearts at the remembrance of my long happy life with you: "Here lies one who loved us and whom we loved." No matter how deep my sleep I shall hear you, and not all the power of death can keep my spirit from wagging a grateful tail. 

Tuesday Jan 9, 2001 - I chatted in my Chat room for quit a few hours this evening. I had to go get myself a new mouse because the one I had broke on me today. I was Talking with ToddJ in the chat and he mentioned the Microsoft Intella mouse with the laser.. I got it! It's different from the other.  I also got a head set microphone for my shows. We went to Office Max to get it. The end of this month I'm putting more money Into our IRA's and Savings. I got some Solid Gold kibble for the dogs to add to the food I bake for them. It rained the past two days so it feels like good sleepy days.  I was playing with my dog Bookie on the bed tonight and he just loves to attack and bit the ears. I told him he still makes me giggle after all this time.:) Not many things in life can do that. Nemo is totally sweet, I took a picture of him today and put it up on their front page. It's the Second picture down. His teeth are showing and I just thought it was cute. Bookie & Nemo's Website. Nemo's Birthday is the 13th! He will be 1... Someone stated that this Diary was Depressing.? Maybe I just come across this way because I'm writing instead of speaking. A lot of the Depressing stuff is taken wrong. I like to Achieve my goals and if I don't achieve them than I get frustrated with myself, bla, bla... Don't take it as depressing or bad though. They are just my thoughts at the moment. Just Seems like I like to write and I write more when I am thinking or frustrated about something.

Monday Jan 8, 2001 - I got up took my shower, feed the boys. I went down and cleaned out my Cat Box and sweept the downstairs floor. I talked to my mom on the phone today. She is working a lot this week and was very tired. We made a lot of money this year, where did it go? We should have saved a lot more then we did. My plan this year is put at least 25 percent into savings. I am Not going to spend my money like I did this past year. I don't want to end up working when I'm 50 or 60 years old.  I'm so mad at myself, I could spit. I want to be smarter and save so I can have a good future when it does get bad. Why do we go through stupid periods of our life? I could slap myself for not waking up last year or the half year before that. I really hate saying I should have. Hopefully I can make up for my savings this year and get some saved. I can't seem to keep a balance so I am just logging what we spend each day weather it's business or personal in my own notebook ledger. How lazy can I get! My other New Years resolution this year since it is still early. Sometimes I want to cry, what the hell happened to my train of thought to have made me Insecure a couple years ago. I wish I could go back and knock some sense into this thick head for going through my "mid life crises" or whatever that was. Sometimes I wish I could go get that girl I was before. So happy, fresh, young. Now I feel like I've changed in some way, I don't know how to get that back.  

Sunday Jan 7, 2001 - I got up and the first thing I did was weigh myself. I lost another pound and am 144 now! God, I am being soo good! yipeee!

Saturday Jan 6, 2001- I got up and cleaned my house today. I chatted in the chat room for about 3 hours. I have lost 3 pounds since the 1st! wahooo! Pretty soon in about 9 more pounds I'll be the same weight I was at the beginning of 99, thank god. I went to the store today and got some more healthy stuff to eat. I had to pick up some cod liver oil and flax seed oil for my dogs food. I surf the net a lot but the only sites I surf is French Bulldog website.. I am addicted. I am glad the convention is over. Seems like a lot of people are so fake. What a headache to put up with. I don't like people like that because they think of themselves and not others, way to much. Noone is better then the next person, most of life is a stroke of luck. If your born beautiful, it's luck. There is hunger, abuse and little animals out there that are in need of help. Maybe I'm in the "Porn" business but at least I have a heart. I sometimes feel like a lot of people out there don't. They don't live in the real world and are in their own dream land thinking they are the bomb or whatever their warped mind believes. They get hardened by what life dishes out to them. My opinion is, take what life dishes out and get back up, I always did! I have been through a lot of ups and down but you know what? I am glad because if events in my life didn't happen to me I wouldn't be where I am today. It turned out for the best in the end. It usually did to. The bad and good experiences have made me a better and smarter person. If you don't learn from your experiences in life then what would be the point? I'm rattling on but I hope I don't confuse you. I think I jump from subject to subject.

Friday Jan 5, 2001- Yesterday I had an appointment with Dr. Sullivan at 1:30pm so we didn't make it to the Convention until 2pm. I passed out a few of my postcard advertisements and talked to a few of the Exhibitors. We ran into KC and her husband (Certified Amateurs) and talked with them for a few Moments. I got a picture of me and KC since I haven't taken any yet. We ran into a couple we meet the night before named Sheika or something very similar to that name. We only stayed a couple hours then came home. I went to sign Bookie up for obedience classes last night but it's so far away from me that it would be too long of a drive. The guy gave me a Las Vegas Dog Fanciers book that has trainers that do group obedience classes, I will call about them sometime this week. We went to a party that one of the Exhibitors was throwing at the Beach at 8pm. Nothing was going on so we got home early (10pm). Today we went to the convention and I passed out a bunch of my Post Card Flyers. We ran into Mike (Sweet Georgia's Husband), we meet him at the Certified Amateur Party and he is a nice person. Kristina and Gary seem very down to earth and Genuine. I get a long with Kristina very well and I wish we lived closer, her and her Husband are very nice. I don't like the "I'm better then you attitude" and just don't want anything to do with all that. Very Immature, just like a lot of people in anything that is Adult type Industry. 

Thursday Jan 4, 2001-  We went to dinner with Kristina and her husband right before the party last night. We went to The Grand Lux in the Venetian Hotel, I had California Chopped Salad. We got to the party a little early and I had a tour of the place. My God it was a nice room. It had two Jacuzzis a workout room two Giant sized bedroom and the works. The damn Video wasn't working right the first hour, so there were a lot of upset people. It wasn't a show or big production so it's not like anyone missed a whole lot. The place was packed with a couple hundred people.. I meet a lot of the Amateur Girls we do Video for (Copper Kitty, Jensex, Kristina, Becca), I'm probably missing a few so don't shoot me. I also meet a lot of girls that I've heard of and haven't heard of. I try to remember names but it's hard to. I got drunk and I am paying the price today. I always tell myself don't drink but I do that stupid shit once a year it seems. The Camera was in the main room so all you could see was people eating, drinking and dancing. It was fun. It got so hot that me and Jeff sat on some chairs by a window in one of the bedrooms to relax and take the pressure off our feet. I had a few thoughts about how i feelt about doing porn on here but We decided people would take it totally wrong so I just left it off. 

Wednesday Jan 3, 2001 - Don't forget tonight is the Certified Amateurs party and we will be broadcasting from their live around 9pm Pacific Time (Midnight Eastern Time).  We are suppose to go to Dinner later today with Kristina and Her husband. I just got done taking my shower and putting on lotion so I feel good.

Tuesday Jan 2, 2001- It's 66 degrees out today. I am glad we live here instead of the Midwest! It's cold there, I hate being cold. I got my nails done at Noon then came right home. I did the dishes then went to the store (Smith Food and Drugs) with Jeff to get a few things to eat. I made some cinnamon buns then made my dogs their Dog food I always make fresh and bake. I cleaned my upstairs bathroom, after I laid down with Bookie for a few moments. Poor guy, he has some gastric/regurgitation problems and he don't feel well sometimes. I love that movie "Dark Angel" and watched that at Nine. I did spend a couple late hours tonight working on this Diary and trying to get it "organized"..

Monday Jan 1, 2001 - HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! This past year went too fast! wow. Jeff and I sleep till about noon today. I got up early but after I feed the boys (Bookie & Nemo) and Tiggy I went back to bed and didn't get up till Jeff did at Noon. I did the Dishes while Jeff was in the Shower and cleaned up. We worked on the computers for awhile then went and Had his truck washed. We then went to the Ulta 2 store so I could get me a curler blow dryer and I got some base and lip sticks. My other curler/blow-dryer was getting pretty old and wasn't blowing out any air so I threw it away this morning. We stopped at Vons (Grocery store) on the way home and I picked up some stuff for a salad and Jeff got some chicken to eat. I made myself some Macaroni and Cheese for dinner while Jeff ate his dinner. I ate salads all day yesterday so I didn't eat one today yet. We slept so late that the day was gone before we had a chance to do a whole lot.  I took a nap after I chatted on on the computer for a few moments. Tomorrow I need to go get my Nails done.  Wednesday is the Certified Amateurs party we will be broadcasting live from. We have to get there a little early to set the computer and camera up so we can make sure everything is running smoothly on our Servers. We are going out to Dinner with Kristina and Her husband before the party on Wednesday to. She is one of the Girls we do Video for. She is at Kristinasworld.com. I've been talking to Angie over Yahoo Messenger a lot. I like that program. I meet Angie through my website and she and her husband Dan are really Nice people, Down to Earth. Keeps me sane, talking to Her and my Mom I think. Last night for most of the night I talked in my Chat Room. Most the Old Gang was there! I was so happy to see everyone. Talking to them brings back the old days. Everyone seems so occupied with other things now days. It's hard to get all the long time Chatters in there all at once. I'm usually in there in the evening talking anyways.